Posted on Friday, August 14, 2009 at 10:24 PM
Im hurt...
Im really hurt...
Coz no one really cares for me now...
No one SHOWS they care for me too...
I need you..
I can only think of you...
I cried in class...
I still remembered a message which you sent me...
Everytime i see it...
I would cry...
No matter where i am...
You are my special someone...
You always will be...
I dont wanna lose you...
I really hated making that choice...
I was forced to...
Im useless...
I know...
I hurt you...
I a hopeless bastard...
Nobody really cares much about me...
Nobody really bothered asking...
Why does things happen so fast and have to come in chains...
You told me...
You would treat me better...
But does treating me better
equals to giving me faces...
ignoring me...?
Im confused... seriously...
I really wanted to call you...
But i cant...
My family is almost gone now...
I thought i could really be with you and talk with you...
HE is always against me
HE is always angry at me
HE is always bullying me...
while
SHE is anrgy at me
SHE doesnt noe what i think...
SHE never really did cared...
and
HE IS ALWAYS COMING HOME LATE
HE IS ALWAYS TURNING A COULD SHOULDER TOWARDS SHE
HE NEVER ASKED
HE NEVER CARED
HE NEVER CONCERNED...
i really couldnt understand what is with my family...
i really hoped you were here...
i really hoped i could hug you...
i really hoped i could kiss you...
i really hoped...
but you are ignoring me...
you are the only one who knew most of the things...
coz i never did tell anyone...
you are the special one...
who can help me...
you are the only one...
WHO CAN PUT ME TO SLEEP...
but now...
im really having sleepless nights...
i could only think of you...
i toss and turn at night...
wondering... "where are you...?"
i can cry...
many many times...
i could dream of you...
and wake up crying...
sometimes...
i could see you by my side...
i reached out to hug you...
tearing...
but you juz...
disappeared...
you were the only one...
who let me sleep at night...
For we had so much memorable memories...
and i could really think of them...
There was many times...
where i really wanted to say...
i love you...
but the truest part is that...
im afraid...
i could never forgive myself...
never again...
These days...
I could never really live...
I never had appetite to eat...
I hardly speak a word at home...
I nearly left home...
I nearly died...
I wanted to leave home...
so i could find you...
I wanted to kill myself...
So i could be with you...
you would be the only person i would wanna see...
When i die...
I really love you...
But im scared...
That i would hurt you...
I wouldnt mind hurting myself...
But i mind...
If you are unhappy...
I had never really understood love...
until you were here for me....
You are that special someone...
You will always be...
No matter what happens...
Be it 2 months...
2 years..
Or 2 decades...
I will wait...
For you to be with me once again...
For you have taken up the hugest part of my heart...
That is love...
You are the only one for me...
Nobody can ever replace you...
I'm Sorry...
Aishiteru... Now and Forever...